Last week, and I twittered about this, I attempted to do something that really really really terrified me. I am afraid to do new things, I think in part because of my perfectionism -- if I can't do it perfectly on the first try then why even do it? -- but also because I don't want to be judged. The content of that last sentence is a post or a book itself.
What was so terrifying?
A class at my gym. Sounds ridiculous, but I could not bring myself to try. Yesterday was my one-year anniversary of "dating JIM," and I think that realizing that the one-year mark was coming up, and I hadn't toughened up enough yet to try a class got to me. DBAP, Court, DBAP. I decided to go to the Body Sculpt class, because it sounded the most innocent. And I wouldn't have to look coordinated. THANK GOD, I wasn't the only newbie, so Jenny and I sat in the back. I made a new friend, and I'm trying new things, and I'm so proud about it you'd think that I was in kindergarten. Except I use terms like DBAP.
Half way through Body Sculpt, when my body was definitely feeling the burn, Jenny turns to me and asks me if I'm staying for Kickboxing - because she is. I was NOT planning on staying for kickboxing, and the inner me was having a huge debate: YES, NO, YES, NO, YES, NO and my voice chose YES. Partially because I did not want to BAP in front of my new friend.
I'm so so so so so glad I did. Kickboxing is amazing. I beat the shit out of a huge bag for an hour while listening to loud music with really cool girls. Somehow, they aren't judgey at all, they are just nice, but they could also kick your ass. Soon, I will be able to kick your ass (and that statement also goes out to my current Best of Asshole in Indiana - watch. your. self.). I have a great time, I'm learning fast, and I want green gloves. I'm not the best at anything on my left side (shit, I probably shouldn't have revealed that weakness), and especially when I don't even know which side is actually my left side, but when I get my green gloves, Grant is going to put a big L and R on them respectively. The best thing about the class, though, is that when I leave, I'm in the best mood ever.
I'm pretty badass.
In other news, I'm really not coordinated, and I'm not doing as swimmingly in the Zumba class, where we do Latin dance - YET. Shakira best step off, son.
the red and black
2 days ago